How To Change From Being a Helicopter Parent

By Subodh / April 17, 2015

There is no denying life has become quite complex and parents need to keep an eye on their children, during the tender years of childhood and transition to teen hood. This is essential for keeping the innocent ones safe from numerous harms and malicious aspects of life. However, while trying to ensure your kids stay safe, happy and on right tracks, you should not go overboard!

Why Being Helicopter Parents Is Not A Feasible Option

There is a section of parents who feel they should be always alert and overprotective about the kids. They resort to this mindset from a sense of safeguarding their kids from risks and harms in life. However, most of them fail to understand adopting such a mindset and attitude can be detrimental both for the kid and the bond between parents and children.

Helicopter Mom

In reality, excessive scrutiny into every aspect of children’s life and effort to stay involved in their whereabouts can be counterproductive. It can turn kids distant and they may start hiding things, leading to many complications. So called helicopter parents indulge in a child activity monitoring overdrive, sneaking into everything in the kid’s life including homework and social media activities. If you think, you belong to that league of parents, it is time you rein in the excess!

Below listed are a few tips to help you get out of the helicopter parents mode:

  • Stop Doing Everything For The Kids – When the kids are young you can teach them how to eat, ride a cycle or do a lot of daily chores. However, as they grow up and go to schools, you should stop doing things for them gradually. There are over doting parents who keep on doing things for kids even when their peers learn to do thing for themselves. You should be there to help them out in performing certain tasks but do not make them dependent on you- it will turn out to harmful.
  • Stop Interfering Into Their Personal Things – Some people just cannot understand but kids also need to socialize with friend in their own ways! When the kids grow up a little, you need to give them the space they deserve. Snooping in their social media accounts and monitoring everything they share with friends can be toxic for your bond with the kids. Similarly, refrain from the habit of calling them over and again when they are with their friends.
  • Let Them Make Mistakes Sometimes – A lot of parents want to make their kids perfect in everything –study, extracurricular activities, sports etc. This is actually not possible and by trying to be a perfectionist father or mother, you will end up harming the kid. Every kid can make some mistakes in life or career. Let them make mistakes sometimes and learn the correct ways. Do not be over protective in your bid to make them perfect at all times.
  • Do Not Compare Your Kids In A Negative Way – Some parents feel they can make their kids fare better by comparing them with peers, and cousins. This can be counterproductive. Pressurizing kids and comparing them in negative manner can actually annoy them and affect their study and mental health in long run.
  • Accept They May Think Differently Or Have Different Wishes – There are some parents who feel the kids should think like them and have similar preferences. They need to remember, every person, irrespective of gender and age have distinct identity and their preferences can vary. If your child likes something different, try to see reason. Instead of scolding the kid and forcing to follow you, ask him to explain his viewpoint.

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