The word ‘cursing’ usually means using offensive words when you are feeling angry or annoyed. But you will find a lot of people who curse out of habit. No matter why a person is cursing it is difficult to stand them for a long time. However, if you also start cursing in the same tone there will be no difference between you and the other person. The other guy may not be well mannered but you are. No matter how much you get provoked, intentionally or unintentionally, you should maintain your composure and not curse back in the same tone. Instead, you should resort to gentler means whereby you are able to maintain your image of a well-mannered person. At the same time the technique you use should not provoke the other person further causing him to become more abusive. Your mannerism should help the other person calm down. This is how you can deal with a cursing person.
Don’t Get Provoked And Curse Back; Stay Calm And Let Your Anger Subside
Fire cannot be controlled with fire. Fire can only be doused with water. It is quite natural for you to get angry when the other person is cursing you. There are many people who start fighting back because they believe in paying back in the same coin. You must have observed that trying to pay back in the same coin does not help control the situation; instead it aggravates the ire of the other person. When the other person is getting abusive, you must first try to control yourself so that the situation can be controlled better. Only when you have calmed down you will be able to think clearly and act properly.
To avoid getting provoked by the abuses take a deep breath and repeat this in your mind several times, “it is okay”. You will have to repeat this several times until your anger has subsided completely. Deep breathing is age old practice which has the scientifically proven positive impact on the body. When you inhale more oxygen, it helps lower your heart rate and calms you down. Once you have calmed down, think what you must do next to control the situation and prevent it from getting worse.
Trying To Understand Where The Other Person Is Coming From Could Be Helpful
There are some people who are uncontrollable and they just somehow enjoy creating scene. There are only very few people who curse for no reason. Most of them have some reason behind cursing and swearing. The reason could either be spontaneous reaction to something undesirable or it could be the habit of cursing.
Once you have calmed yourself down, try and figure out what is causing the other person to curse. Ask them politely if there is something they feel you did wrong and if you could help. If you do not fight back and stay polite high chances the other person will also mellow down. Even if the other person doesn’t calm down immediately you keep maintaining your composure. They will eventually calm down and listen to you.
There are many people who are so habitual of cursing and using abusive words that they don’t even realize they are doing so. Such people’s behavior could mostly be attributed to their upbringing. You will notice such people using curses even when they are not angry. In fact, you will find a lot of people who get more abusive when they are happy. There is nothing much you can do to instantly change the behavior of such people. They need to be worked upon.
Be Vocal And Tell The Other Person How You Feel About The Curses
If the other person is the one who uses abusive language as a habit, you need to constantly remind him that you don’t like such way of talking and he must avoid it in your presence, especially when he is addressing you. Since he is not cursing out of disrespect, most likely he will understand. Although he may be able to change himself only momentarily and get back to his abusive habits, he will still become more conscious in your presence after a period of time.
If the other person is abusing you because he is angry with you then again you will need to tell him that you don’t like the tone. You don’t have to tell this to him in the angry tone. In fact, as suggested before, you must calm yourself down first and then allow him to calm down by maintaining your composure. Once the other person has calmed down, sort out the reason that made him angry and abusive. Once you have settled the things, tell him how you felt about the entire episode and you will not expect the same again.
If The Other Person Is Absolutely Uncontrollable, Leave The Scene
If calming down and staying polite doesn’t do the trick and the other person continues hurling abuses at you, then you will need to avoid him. Get away from the scene and stay distant from him. Don’t get into the verbal dual with him regardless of his behavior.